From heaven, into a pervert
by Vishesh
Summary: God is Issei. Issei is god. both of them. or none of them. they get confused all the time. watch as the most unlikely dynamic duo ascend the height of power and perversity and get some much desired companionship along the way
1. Prologue

**Chapter 1: Prologue**

**Below the city of Eden,**

**The great field,**

"raaaaaawwrr!"

This sound was followed by a multitude of yells and another barrage of attacks that hit the target. whether it caused any significant impact on the monster is beyond the question. the target looked unfazed by the attack and brandished his claws and struck his enemies. queue the cries of..

'Satan help us !'

'oh god! please deliver us from this test!'

'damn those dragons !'

'Fallen angels ! back into formation!'

the last voice belonged to none other than Azazel, the leader of the fallen angels organization known as Grigori. the scene is revealed to be of the fight between the four satans, God, Grigori VS the heavenly dragon duo, Ddraig and Albion. The dragons fought amongst each other as they always do, bunch of immature lizards they were indeed. However, their battle was so destructive that the three factions couldn't allow it to continue. So they intervened to subdue both the dragons . This was going to be tough.

Ddraig fired a huge magma ball towards the Satans seeing their close proximity it would do the maximum damage. The Satan's narrowly evaded the attack and performed counterattacks of their own. The azure maou Leviathan sought to freeze the dragon's legs so as to immobilized it. God side by side with his first angel, Lucifer AKA the Venom of God were attacking Albion head on. Ashtoreth coordinated with rest of the Grigori to tactfully disorient Ddraig who was already suffering from attacks by Asmodeus, but still the power was not enough. God cast a time-slow spell to think for a moment.

'from the time of Adam and eve to the fall of Lucifer and then … this. When will this world know peace? When will the snake of sin detach itself from this world. I know…. I know that this is going to be the only way. I am certain….I think'

God held out his hands and said,' **System. Initiate protocol Doomsday.'**

A bright golden glow appeared on his hands and strange hieroglyphs started revolving around it. The time spell broke and the sky was brightened by blazing golden light.

'Wait.'

The system paused its current task to accept another order from God, not knowing it would be the last given by him.

'System. Suggest Michael to not initialize project . Tell him…. No …. It's not the time yet. Resume protocol Doomsday. And….. goodbye.'

The system, though sentient, was unable recognize the emotional state of God and replied with what it was pre-programmed to do.

**'Goodbye, God.'**

Lucifer was eyeing God warily as he didn't know what the heck was God using… he sure didn't look like going offensive. He wanted to smack the man and tell him to get his head in the game. However, Lucifer suddenly noticed a growing heat. He looked in the direction of the horizon behind god and witnessed a sudden uptake in light energy. It was growing exponentially. Only after moments of temporary blindness, he understood what had took place. God has used his final ultimate ace. He had summoned the collective domain of sun gods. And then…he unleashed it on Albion. The devils had to close their eyes to avoid being blinded. The gigantic ball of fire fired a colossal beam that passed right through God himself and struck Albion knocking him out. The blast was so terrific that Albion was nearly obliterated. Ddraig took a good chunk of damage too. Albion fell on the field with such momentum that it was the only 10 degree earthquake recorded by the divine archives to occur on earth.

With Albion gone the devil's and fallen angels concentrated on Ddraig who was still fighting them off . The sun behind God disappeared and with it whatever gravitational force holding God in air deactivated too. God fell on ground but before he could land an angel appeared out of the blue and caught him. It should be known that God didn't look like a …. Well… God. His face was too pale and his blonde hair was steadily turning white. His perfect skin was getting filled up by wrinkles. It looked like he was aging a thousand years by the minute, the angel quickly looked across the great field and saw the battle. It was clear that Ddraig would be overpowered any moment now. She quickly teleported back to heaven to treat God….. otherwise things would get really bad.

**The 5th layer of heaven**

The angel brought God on the most populous part of the heaven's city Eden. The city looked like it had been fashioned from a single gigantic mountain of gold. For as far as the eyes could, there would lie the auspicious beauty of gold. The city was as busy as ever, Eden folk bustling around and completing their various tasks. It is said that one has to qualify for heaven three times consecutively to gain a permanent residence here.

The angel without any dilly-dallying took the graviously injured father of heaven straight to the chambers of the archangels where Michael and Gabriel presided over the general masses and kept a watch on the earth in their father's stead.

**The chambers of the archangels**

Michael and Gabriel's has dropped open seeing their father in such a condition. Michael quickly left his chair ( poor guy had to leave his breakfast) and casted several diagnostic spells on him. The resultant black glow didn't do anything to calm his already strained divine nerves.

'this is bad sister, very bad….. I don't think that we have the means necessary to immediately cure this serious damage.' Spoke Michael

'what has happened brother?' asked Gabriel

'apart from shot nerves, internal bleeding, cardiac arrest … there is a plethora of things wrong with him sister. We immediately need to take him to the seventh level.'

'yes, you are right brother. Let us not waste any more time.'

As the siblings headed towards the portal , they expected it to allow passage directly to the seventh level where the system presided so that they could heal him. They wanted to accompany God into battle however it was reasoned that with his watchful eyes not on the world right now, someone had to guard it in this absence.

As they advanced towards the portal it looked like whatever was powering it up existed no more and it shut down. To complete the dramatic effect the system dutifully produced itself before them.

**'Apologies archangels but the seventh level has been restricted for an indefinite period of time.'**

'this is on whose orders ?' enquired Gabriel

**'God'**

The short and simple reply of the system rattled the angels. Why would God forbid his own life from being saved? Michael did try exploiting some common loopholes in the system so that it could grant them access but the command from God in this case seemed to be iron-clad , there was no room for negotiation. Gabriel looked at her father, he was dying and here they couldn't do a single thing. Michael could bare it no more.

'Gabriel, send for the technomancers .. we must initiate …' Michael was interrupted by

**' warning . God has suggested to terminate that course of action. It is not recommended to proceed /dC002 archangel Michael '**

'exactly. God has only 'suggested' it… but not ordered it. /dC002 will commence, System.'

**'as you wish , archangel Michael.' **For those who don't know. System is the kind of babysitter the angels , when they were born, got. It is without any emotion, thus without any tolerance for extra cookies being taken from the cookie jar when the angels thought God wasn't looking. Well, the looking job was/Is still being conducted by the system. Michael inwardly was giddy for getting one on the system. Well, he clearly didn't know on what path he had set on.

**Lab of the technomancers**

Here you could expect every mechanism down to every single transistor as the one which had been used to create The Frankenstein's Monster. Except this time It would be to bring back The/a God. Technomancers, the race of angels most in tune with modern technology were busy setting up the apparatus. They walked around calibrating and then recalibrating the machines for they could not go wrong this time… the world depended on their intellect and skills today.

The technomancers had placed God in a pod which was connected to various terminals by thick wires suggesting the large voltage that is going to be used. Michael and Gabriel were asked to leave the laboratory as their divine aura could interfere with the step by step process and pervert the result.

**With Michael and Gabriel**

Both siblings were watching the live transmission of the battle against Albion. Thanks the system for amazing coverage on every part of the world. Ddraig's boosted moves had the devil's looking at him in exasperation followed by gathering whatever power they could to renew their attacks on the dragon whereas the fallen angels were faring slightly better as their light powers allowed them to blind the dragon for some time during which they attacked him. Lucifer was bleeding profusely, Leviathan had to user her staff to support herself. Asmodeus was knocked out and ashteroth was running on fumes. Lucifer looked towards the fallen, their numbers had greatly reduced.

'so we aren't feeling the brunt of the attack by ourselves huh?' he turned towards his fellow devil's.

'what are you doing?! Get up and fight!'

'but Lucifer, we can't go like…..' beelzebub was interrupted

'I am ashamed of you!' Lucifer snapped

'what the heck?' was the thought running through the heads of the rest of the devil.

'is this how our lord Satan envisioned us to be? Bunch of coward …. Acting indecisively!.. When the fallen are doing better than us… when WE are the devil kings? Huh?... bah! You all are just one trick ponies! I will show …..'

SLAP

'shut up you maggot! I can fight! ….*huff*… talk about yourself..*huff*.. I can do this all day! I will defeat Ddraig and prove my worth so that history will remember me for centuries…' said Leviathan

Lucifer smiled. Atleast he was able to motivate the Leviathan.

'good. So you know what to do?'

'yes. We must use our keys.'

Beelzebub's eyes flew wide open, even Beelzebub woke up in a second hearing that. Lucifer raised his eyebrow ever so eloquently yet his smirk was still present.

'I am unsure. Can that deal with Ddraig? ' asked Beelzebub

'of course it will, God was able to take Albion out with his doomsday protocol, I am sure that our keys can handle Ddraig.'

The four maou accepted this as a viable plan. Each maou summoned a key which had their own colour imprint on it, like red for Lucifer, blue for Leviathan and so on. Each maou straightened their arm and pointed the keys in outward direction, strange lock-seals appeared before them. The seals accepted the keys. As you all know at cliché moments like this something out of the world is bound to happen. Well, this instance is not any different. The ground shook violently before a three storey tall arm made entirely out of rocks, it seemed, with lava flowing through some moderate sized ( in reference to the arm size ) pores. The arm grapples to ground and exerted humongous force so as to pull the rest of the body it.

Strangely it was taking a hell of a time. The maou were literally sweating bullets because of the energy the summoning was taking out of them. Ddraig looked mildly amused at the strange display of dramatics in between a fight.

'what the heck.. we should have developed the prototype more… this is becoming increasingly useless!' thought Lucifer

The arm however didn't disappoint anymore and exerted enough force for the body to come out.

'Ddraig, meet our latest invention.. The magic to summon the class XXXXX Fire giant king Surtur!' Lucifer turned to Surtur

'Lord Surtur, please help us overcome the might of the Welsh Dragon!'

Since this was a summoning spell one usually expects the summoned person/beast/thing to right away follow your orders. Alas, this spell was a prototype so…

'why should I help you ants ?' asked Surtur

Queue the collective jawdrops from the Grigori and heaven's angels and the extremely embarrassed red faces of the devil kings.

'oh come on! We will give you enough gold to last your tribe for decades.' Offered Asmodeus .

'we mine our own gold! '

'how about weapons crafted from mithril and enchanted by fire magic!'

'don't need that. We already have those.'

'oh fine ! We shall lend you the power of Satan's goat for a century!'

'the goat is weak!'

'it is not!'

'it is weak'

'NOT'

'IS'

'NOT'.

It was only the cunning and knowledge of Lucifer that saved them an awfully long discussion in which Ddraig could easily kill them all since they were immobilized using the magic of the Keys.

'we shall give you 50 crates of mount Hades special fire-brand cookies!' said Lucifer.

'100'

'75'

'deal.'

The fire giant king Surtur breathed out, and a miniature ash storm formed under his nose. His whole body was mighty 10 storey tall ,built with minerals of a variety but only of one colour which was black. And also the lava, can't forget the lava , it's important. Surtur raced towards Ddraig and leaped into the air to deliver a godsmack. Ddraig parried him by intersecting his wings to his fist and then removing it. Surtur then threw a wild haymaker which struck Ddraig 's torso and leaving him writhing on the ground. However , just as Surtur was about to finish the job, Ddraig tail-swiped his feet which made Surtur fall to the ground. Ddraig then dug his claws into one of the five eyes of Surtur, partially blinding him. Surtur shook madly with pain and rage. It seemed like something snapped inside of him, he grapples Ddraig's hind leg from behind and lifted him in the air and threw him across the field. Ddraig, however regains his footing and the battle continues.

The four maou meanwhile were entirely drenched in sweat. There effort, though commendable wasn't enough to defeat Ddraig. This was a grave situation if Ddraig stayed alive then it was a sure that they wouldn't be for much longer. So they directed their natural devil blood power into the key strengthening Surtur immensely. Surtur began emitting a blood red glow.

'oooh! Devil blood power! Nothing like it… except maybe those fire-plated chocolate flavoured cookies.'

With renewed vigour Surtur began fighting Ddraig. Ddraig could only hold up against the new devil-powered attack barrage by the fire giant king for only so long. With one last grapple saved in him Ddraig was defeated. However, the maou had exerted enough of their life force but to seal Ddraig like God did to Albion it seemed that the cost would have to be their own life. The maou exchanged glances, a non-verbal communication took place. And then it happened.

**'key:Barbatos mode. ACTIVATE'**, yelled all four maou collectively.

This mode gave Surtur even more power and he was able to use his signature volcanic eruption move to utterly destroy Ddraig 's body and hence the system again converted a dragon today into a scared gear. However, the joy didn't last long and the maou began to feel their years of life slipping away like sand.

'well, now this happens!' commented Asmodeus.

'I hereby transfer my reign of hell to the second generation of ours.' Commanded Lucifer before he faded.

Following lucifer's example all the three maou handed over their seats of power to the second generation before fading.

**Back to Michael and Gabriel**

Both archangels dipped their heads to honour the sacrifice of the four devil kings who have given their lives to protect the world from its imminent destruction. A technomancer came out of the lab and said that they procedure is ready to commence. It would take a large amount of time for the complete reconstruction of their father. But it would happen of that, they were sure.

**A large, large amount of time later.**

The world has moved on. With drastic downfall in the population of all three factions, a quick and unreliable ceasefire was proposed and immediately put into effect. After the defeat of the dragon duo, the war had continued as it had for a decade. Several of grigori's top fallen angels were slayed in battle, more than half of the devil's pillars had been completely eradicated. Heaven wasn't spared from this desolation either and saw their numbers, once numerous, now… not so much.

Meanwhile, the procedure the bring back god had been continuing without any hiccups. The archangels still couldn't access the seventh level of heaven, despite their repeated attempts, they couldn't get system to reveal the reason for god's ambiguous orders.

But the time of despair was at end for heaven, the technomancers had recently recovered god's body to a form that was fit for the next stage of the process. The technomancers with the help of their magical counterparts, sorcerers had managed to secure the link to god's faded astral form in the void. Technomancers had informed the archangels that the final phase of the resurrection process was ready to commence.

Michael and Gabriel ventured inside the lab. They technomancers had finished their preparation for the** /dC002** and were giving the finishing touch. The head technomancer came down the observation room and informed them that the procedure was about to begin and thus they were required to come to the observation room.

Michael and Gabriel watched with bated breaths as their hopes soared high for the resurrection of their father. The technomancer in typical frankenstein fashion pulled the lever down and…. Well I did brief you about this earlier, lightning struck the pod. Gabriel's eyes delighted in the fact that she could sense her father's luminous gold aura in the pod. And then at an almost clichéd moment the apparatus of the technomancers began emitting strange radiation which shook the entire laboratory. The mechanism started to fizzle and the sparks made themselves known by striking the observation glass via which the procedure was being monitored. However ,this didn't continue for long as the machines powered down indicating the completion of the procedure. The monitoring devices indicated the presence of a healthy physical life form. The angels and technomancers watched and watched until…

'OUR LORD IS ALIVE!'

'HOORAY!'

'LET'S CELEBRATE!'

And a ton of similar cheers went through the crowd. And it should have …after all… God is alive.

Michael, however arched an eyebrow. He knew something was wrong but couldn't put his finger on it. The lid of the pod suddenly shot out. All the cheers stopped, angels gazed at the pod with such intensity that it seemed as if the pod would disappear in thin air. Then a figure stepped out with a drunken gait. However smoke covered the Angel's view. The figure began emitting a golden aura yet all the angels instead of being comforted shrunk away from the figure. The nature of the holy aura was too maniacal. It seemed as if the one who possessed it was…. Unstable.

Finally the figure came into view and to say that the angels were appalled at seeing it would be a major understatement. The resurrected God's body was greyish all over except at the abdomen where it was charred and black in colour with several depressions in skin. Golden ruins lit up on various places of his body. He had long wavy black hair that seemed to defy gravity and floated mid-air. His eyes had irises of solid,rugged gold with a bright gold spot in between. The God was mostly naked. Thank God he was partially clothed. Then he spoke,

"revolt of 1857 india…. No sherlock season five…. Internet is AWESOME... Napoleon is not short heighted?... I hate mosquitoes…." And a plethora of random senseless thoughts.

Angels became even more convulsed with fear. This was not their God…. This thing was something else… something wrong. Before they could voice their thoughts and capture what previously was their God, he began emanating a ruby red glow and it could be seen that parts of his body starting from his toes, his fingernails, the ends of his long hair began disintegrating into that glow.

The figure yelled

'_ RAAAAWWWRRRR!'_

and began thrashing around like a mad baboon. Angels fired golden nets to trap the figure. Michael and Gabriel could take it no more and let out a sliver of their power which stopped all the angels in their tracks. The figure also stopped . He looked above him and noticed the roof of the lab. He jumped up only to tear a hole in the roof and escaped. The head technomancer watched, aghast at how their centuries worth of hard work had turned out to be and then grumbled about stupid experiments tearing a hole in the roof but one look from Gabriel shut him up.

**Back to the resurrected God**

He was flying. He could not remember anything other than a strange feeling of belonging towards those white-winged insects that tried to kill him (or so he thought). Suddenly all his senses went haywire. He , in his deranged state of mind was able to decide on a location to visit. Still meaningless words escaped his mouth.

'high potential target…found…**/dC002…progressing'**. Distance : 734 GdU. Expected time : /** T-48 minutes**/.

After this, God dived into a well-known and devil controlled city. What else? This city had an all-girls school which recently turned co-ed.

Yeah, meaningless words indeed.

**Author's note –**

This is actually the rendition of my other fanfic which had the same style as this one, however I took it down and this is the improved version. I have the next chapter almost ready too.

I am keeping this chapter short to gauge your reactions. Future chapters (if any) would atleast be of 5k words or more. As you may have noticed, the concept is slightly different from other dxd fanfic you may know. I am not planning for a beta reader as I don't need anyone other than all you guyz reading my work first. Also I have a sort of pre-defined route for this story which i think holds great potential HOWEVER if you suddenly have the proverbial bulb over your head light up then plz suggest me for plot. There will be an HAREM. Yeah that's final. No changing it.

But, then again u guyz have the power to decide the members of the harem.. so … fair?

Though, I am sad to say this, grayfia absolutely cannot be the part of this harem. Neither can Gabriel. I think incest is a criminal offence in Christianity so…yeah. Other than this, everyone is fair game.

also please bare with the thought marks and colon marks for this chapter. it would be corrected from the next chapter


	2. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

**Kuoh playground**

**Present day**

Issei was rather enjoying his date with yuuma. She was an amazingly hot girl who was interested in HIM to boot. How hilarious is that?! He even bought a gift for her to increase his chances of getting on with her. They wandered towards a fountain in the center of the park they were in. Yuuma skipped up to issei and brought her face close to his ears, just enough so that her hot breath could be felt by issei. She asked.

'Issei, would you do something for me?' Issei's pervy senses tickled.

'Yes, of course!'

'Would you die for me?' Issei didn't believe what he had heard. So he asked

'umm.. could you repeat that please?'

'Please would you die for me?' her voice had changed. She made a mad dash for the fountain and jumped. Issei could only watch as the sweet looking girl he had spent the evening with sprouted two large black wings , and her attire changed from that if a schoolgirl to that of a S&M Mistress. Momentarily blinded by such sexiness in front of him, issue's pervy self took command.

'Ah! Yuuma-Chan please show me some more!'

She mentally face-faulted. This guy even in this dire situation didn't deviate from his pervy nature. Killing him would mean one less piece of scum on this planet.

'Shut up! You insolent boy, my name is Raynare, not Yuuma, its only fair that you get to know the name of the one who is going to kill you !'

She readied up a spear of light and threw it towards issei. It struck issei on his torso, and passed clean through his back, causing a fatal wound. issei dropped to the ground and began coughing up blood.

'If you want to blame someone then blame God, for he is the reason for your Death. The sacred gear inside you is too powerful to be allowed to manifest here.' With that said she flew away to report the success of her mission. She didn't even notice the Golden deranged God that was free-falling from the sky.

Issei couldn't do anything but watch on as he lied on the ground. His life force leaking by the second. He thought,

'Is this the end? Why?! I am still a virgin! I haven't had the chance to experience a woman's wonderful feeling on my body. Come on! I still haven't….' Issue's current train of thought was wrecked as he saw a golden light moving towards him from the sky.

"They say not to follow the light, it's the gateway from this realm to the outside….then WHY THE FUCK THEY DIDN'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO IF THAT LIGHT COMES AFTER YOU?!"

Issei tried moving away from the point of impact of that light (which seemed to be him) but to no avail. Issei was dying already, he didn't want to make it more painful, and so he lied there, awaiting his fate.

The light struck the ground area just beside him. Then a figure rose from the crash site. He had long black hair which …. FLOATED MID-AIR?! If issei wasn't dying right now he would be sure to ask the person what hair product he used. Such awesome hair would surely impress girls. The figure was emitting a freakishly golden aura. He turned his head towards him. Issei shrieked with fright, the figure's face looked ghastly.

"**High potential target found. /dC002 step-3 commence. Initiating hybrid link.' Spoke the system."**

Behind the bushes a certain red-head girl watched with rampant interest. Rias was set to revive issei and make him a devil but this.. strange figure had disrupted her plans. She was already sweating from the maniacal holy aura that had saturated the air. She couldn't face this head on. But at the same time her curiosity gripped her, she wanted to see what would happen next.

Issei looked up to the figure that had taken a few steps in his direction.

"Who are you?! What do you want?!" Issei was extremely frightful now. He again tried crawling his way out but he knew that he wouldn't be able to escape. God held out his hand and a golden stream of intangible wires began emerging from his outstretched hand. After lingering for a bit in air, they moved towards issei area quick pace. The wires reached issei's chest.

Rias couldn't believe what happened next. That figure transformed into visible golden energy which started flowing through the wires INTO issei. The process happened so quickly that she had no time to react. After all the Golden energy streams vanished she came out of her hiding position. She went over to issei and checked his vitals.

"Still dead". She mused. Therefore she inferred that it would still be possible to resurrect him and covert him into a devil. So she started the ritual ….and got unexpected results.

**Inside issei's mind**

God appeared inside issei's mind. Needlessly to say it looked like a large brothel which had a raised platform on which was placed a magnificent throne. The walls all had posters of nose-bleedingly hot females in various obscene poses. In the pit below the raised platforms there were many naked and semi-naked girls who looked like they were competing for the attention of the person that sat on the throne. But the throne was empty. So God ventured deeper into issei's mind. There he saw issei on the ground dying. God rushed to him and bent down so that he could observe issei.

**'ERROR: life form in critical condition. ERROR: FOREIGN LIVING SPECIES DETECTED! Analyzing…. Inferring…. Conclusion…. WARNING: /system/god/sacred gear/Longinus/Ddraig.d0d FOUND!'**

God was in a deranged state. That meant that primal emotions and instincts ruled him now. As a result he was perplexed to find another person inhabiting this body.

The confusion gave way to possessiveness. How dare another being inhabit the body chosen by him. So….

**'Overgrown lizard?! Hate lizards! Tails grow back. Perverted immortality. Bad. Bad. Bad! Color? RED! Hate!Flame!Troll! Naruto: Orange is the color of gods! Orange ? NOOOO! . .GOLD! Annihilation!'**

Fortunately the system was able to understand its deranged master's order from the last word. Unfortunately system had minimal jurisdiction in the case Longinus type sacred gears. So it did the next best thing.

'**BLOCKING. Set password: ********.'**

And thus the apparent manifestation of Ddraig was stopped until further notice. God hummed appreciatively. System after finishing God's most ardent wish proceeded to complete /dC002.

'**Begin imprinting. Traits…pervert…analyst…excitable… copied. Physical appearance….facial structure….height….hair style…build…genital length..(Variable)…copied. Psyche….copied. Character module….. Copied. Intelligence level….. Re-adjusted to previous module. Imprinting…..complete. /dC002 step-4 complete. Finalizing…. /dC002 COMPLETE.'**

Then all the changes begin taking place. God's height dropped a few inches. His build became slightly skinny. His floating hair dramatically shortened and matched issei's hairstyle. As for the genitals.. God-like? Moving on, God's psyche got repaired by copying the required components from issei's psyche. God's traits and character, even his age adjusted to completely resemble issei. This was a major problem. Now there was a God on earth without any restrictions. That God is also a pervert. Not a godly pervert though. That title still belonged to issei.

God smiled, his plan had worked. Of course it did! It was God's plan. He looked around.

"**Man! I chose a fantastic container… this guy is at the heights of pervyness. I may learn a thing or two!"**

God explored issei's mind some more. He was extremely star struck. Apparently after the imprinting God now had issei's traits but due to his own original earlier traits that vehemently clashed against them, he received a lesser version of traits. Like pervyness for example. So to God, issei was the pinnacle of this trait which he thought he ought to achieve. Wrenching away from these thoughts he continued.

"**Ohhhhhhh system? Where are ya?"**

On his call, a golden ball of light suddenly appeared and exploded to give way to large screen of golden fabric which …. Looked like it was monocular at the centre.

"**Hello, God. Welcome back to the Earth. Would you like your evening coffee? " Spoke system.**

"**No, but thanks. Damn, it's good to be back. Now let's save issei from the big….. Breasted bad devil out there."**

If the system had been capable to, it would surely have smacked its forehead thinking about the mistake it had committed in choosing God's new avatar. But it was all part of the plan. Part of God's plan.

All the above events happened in a span of 2-3 seconds.

**Back to the playground with issei and rias.**

Obviously, rias wasn't able to observe the phenomenal changes that just took in issei so she, oblivious to his predicament, took to revive him. You can imagine her surprise when issei, by himself, sits up and opened his eyes. They were now of the crystalline gold color, same as God. He looked up to her then started glancing at his surroundings, finding nothing suspicious (except the interest of such a good looking devil on him). God had momentarily gotten control over issei as he still was too weak, suffering from raynare's light spears sure took a tole on his body. God stood up and faced Rias.

"**I thank you for endeavoring to save my container, but now you are free from your obligations. I will take it from here."**

If Rias heard him, she gave no signal. She was too awestruck to see a person die, then get revived the unconventional way (for her) , then claim that it was not actually HIM in control. While she was contemplating what could possibly have happened God grew frustrated, it seemed issei's lack of patience rubbed off on him. So he did the only thing that issei would do in a situation like this. Of course he checked the girl out!

"**Lady, you sure have a nice rack! Can I touch it?"**

Between the Issei's self resurrection and the fallen angels infiltrating her city, God's perverted antics overwhelmed her (as could be clearly seen from her mortified facial expression) and she used her magic circle for a strategic retreat.

"**Oh, she is a shy one. Well, let's see where this issei hyoudou's dwelling place is. I know **(God always knows) **that he will want some clarification of the situation he is in now."**

**While issei is asleep, in his dreamscape**

Issei woke up in his brothel. However he expected himself seated on the throne and gazing at the females beneath him while lecherous thoughts ran rampant in his mind. Instead he found another person strikingly similar to him except a few negligible differences like hair color, eye color, etc. sitting on the throne. There was a coffee table in front of it and then another throne which was identical to the previous one.

The person gestured issei to sit on the other throne. Issei experienced the unique feeling of lucid dreaming as he was able to control his actions here. He sat on the throne and asked the three most logical questions that one would ask.

"Who are you? What do you want? AND WHAT THE HELL HAVE YOU DONE WITH ALL THE SEXY LADIES HERE?!"

It should be noted that the pit was strangely devoid of girls, much to issei's sadness. When God noticed it, he too grew a little upset at the thought.

"**I'll answer your questions in order. First I am God…."**

"EH?"

"**Secondly, I have chosen your body as my host and your Genetic framework to outline my own."**

"EHH?!"

"**Thirdly, I DON'T KNOW WHERE THE FREAKIN' LADIES ARE!"**

"EHHHHHH?!"

"**I know that you have the ability to vocalize many things other than the 'eh' syllable I suggest you use it to properly express your thoughts."**

It is made known that issei's brain capacity was no way lesser than that of Leonardo da Vinci himself. It is just that the major part of his mental activities is firmly dedicated towards ecchi activities and hence his current blank facial expression is justified.

"**You don't believe me, do you?"** Issei only shook his head at that.

"**Ok, let me explain it to you in simple terms. If all started when there was nothingness…."**

**System:'WARNING: EXTREMELY BORING HISTORICAL DATA AHEAD. TIME SKIP BEING CONDUCTED. FAILURE TO COMPLY SHALL RESULT IN A FATAL HEADACHE…TIME SKIP IN PROGRESS….TIME SKIP IN PROGRESS…..TIME SKIP COMPLETE. Live steaming resumed.' '…. And that's how I ended up in you'**

"That was quite a story… so let me get this straight, you are God and you are IN me? Why is that? Why me? What makes me so different?"

"**You see….the pressure that is exerted on one's soul by hosting a being of tremendous power like me is too much. Anyone else would have been killed instantly if I had inhabited their body. So people who are already accustomed to such power are viable. It just so happened that you were used to Ddraig since your birth and there was no alternative. Well,.. There was the other dragon but he had already manifested…anyways, so the system guided me to the only source of my survival. That being you."**

"So… in a way, I saved you? I saved the GOD?!"

"**Yup…in every way"**

"Come to think of it, why did you copy my genes?"

"**I don't fully know what happened but system tells me that I was incomplete. The process of my revival was not fully efficient so the person that came out was my incomplete astral form. I needed some components to stabilize myself. Since you are my new host I copied the necessary parts off you."**

"oh.."

"**which, fortunately or unfortunately made me a pervert too."**

Time seemed to have stopped for issei. He couldn't control his imminent delight upon learning this fact. The GOD , the CREATOR of the world, was a PERVERT! He had more in common with issei than Any other freaking living organism. Issei in his over-excited state asked God.

"which is the part you love the most on the body of an amazingly hot milf?"

"**your preferences are mine. So it's definitely the breasts."**

"Amazing! Tell me this. Would you peak on teenage girls changing or would openly perve on them in a mixed japanese hot spring?"

"I** would obviously peak on girls changing. Apart from the thrill of being caught it also offers slightly more success chances without alerting them. In the mixed bath things can get very bad very soon."**

"Amazing! I would do that too and for the very same reasons". God chuckled at this.

"**however, issei, me being in you also comes with a whole lot of problems."**

"huh? What do you mean by that?"

"**well….''WARNING: EXTREMELY BORING HISTORICAL DATA AHEAD. TIME SKIP BEING CONDUCTED. FAILURE TO COMPLY SHALL RESULT IN A FATAL HEADACHE…TIME SKIP IN PROGRESS….TIME SKIP IN PROGRESS…..TIME SKIP COMPLETE. Live steaming resumed**

"… and that is the reason why angels, fallen angels, and devils remain at each other's throats."

"FUCK MAN! You sure have infinite enemies. I mean putting Amenadiel to spread goat-jokes against LUCIFER?! No wonder he hated you."

"**then I am sure you will understand. System has closed off its major functions to angels because it perceived that they would harm ME. That means angels will be on your ass to make me come back. Which is impossible as the extraction would never be efficient and I would again, be reduced to my incomplete astral form. Devils inherently hate the words 'GOD' and 'ANGELS' so you can expect them coming and trying to kill you. The system informs me that the Grigori governor-general, Azazel has become quite the sacred gear connoisseur and would indeed be curious as to what was able to trap ME in a human, so he will come to investigate as well. It's going to be a mad-house for you, issei."**

"what do I do then ?"

"**priorities. First you need to wake up urgently."**

Before issei could ask what God meant, he was flicked on the forehead by the said entirely and then he saw his throne, his brothel, his dreamscape moving away from him at a lightning pace. And soon he exited his dreamscape was asleep no more.

**In the park**

Issei sat up from his lying position. He idly noticed dried blood on his shirt. He was too unbalanced from his girlfriend killing him and from his conversation with God to properly stand up.

'**don't worry. I know the symptoms of forced ressurection when I see them. Just stretch your arms and legs for the next five minutes and think about seagulls… nesting and we would be good to go.'**

Issei did as God suggested and he gradually began to feel better.

'well.. He must be really something to be called God.'

**'that something also resides in your head and is able to hear all your thoughts. Though , I must say with this amount of hentai manga in your head, I would comfortable for about a decade.'**

Issei felt his life shatter. All the pervy acts he had pulled off, all the time he spent peeking in the girls changing room and all the content of his lecherous discussions with motohama and matsuda….. were now in access of a being that CREATED THE UNIVERSE! That is such a major invasion of privacy and also harbinger of an emotion issei hadn't felt for a long time. Embarrassment.

**Lab of the technomancers, Heaven**

**Present day**

**/ time flows differently in heaven, underworld, astral realms, realms connected to the Yggdrassil and uncharted territories as compared to earth. It has been exactly 156.8 hours from god's departure from heaven whereas a considerably less amount of time has passed on earth. /**

The damage control crew had worked swiftly to mend the broken roof God had gifted them with in his rather dramatic escape ordeal. Most of the angels were still in appalling disbelief as to how their heavenly father could have left them in such a time. Then all of them struck upon the iceberg of realization. Just like a certain blond nun.

_This must be a test by God. I will prove my faith !_

Which may or may not be the case. The head of the technomancers had ordered his crew the repair the damage and clear the debris that God's revival had caused. Suddenly their energy sensitive observer ( a machine whose function lies in its name ) began beeping irregularly.

The lab head was annoyed and examined the machine for results. What he found shocked him all the way to the seventh circle of hell. He turned and screamed for messenger-class angel.

"get the seraphs here. RIGHT NOW !"

After a few moments they came and enquired as to why were they so hurriedly called?

"look at thi". And so the seraphs did.

The ESO was displaying a power reading of exactly God's level in kuoh. However, there was no God-level entity supposed to be present there, as a matter of fact, there were no God level entities since the beginning of time and space, also the nature of this power was quite different from the one they had experienced from the unhinged God.

Therefore , Michael decided,

'Uriel, Gabriel. I will assign you a recon mission. Warp to earth and Analyze this new entity.'

They both gave a tense nod and warped to earth. If only god did that the moment he escaped...quite a lot of Hea-WIN credits would have been saved.

**Headquarters of Grigori, somewhere in Japan**

Azazel was stroking his beard, contemplating the meaning of life while having a mug full of beer in his other hand. Imagine his surprise when a fallen angel burst into his office , panting and started off on some report of his new discovery. The mug fell from azazel's Hand as the fallen angel finished ranting.

'WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY?'

'Azazel-sama, an unknown God power level sacred gear has appeared. We cannot confirm the sacred gear or if it is a longinus class or not.'

'I'll go and check this for myself.'

Saying so, Azazel ventured out of his office towards the portals for the human realm. Nearby in the corridor, a certain war-mongering fallen angel looked on with interest.

**Gremory estate, Underworld**

All the devil's including the maou suppressed a shiver. There was a new enemy out there. Devils didn't know him. Yet his imminent power was clearly sensed by them all. Sirzechs Lucifer took this as an opportunity to stand up from his work desk and venture to the window. There he contemplated the approach they must take towards this new enemy.

Or so we thought. He was just glad that he was able to get a break from work.

Well, that was until his wife-cum-maid dragged him back by the cheek towards work again.

'Grayfia-chan! You are so mean!'

'Sirzechs-sama, you have to finish this stack of paperwork. You have a meeting with the young devils management board within the next hour. Then you have to attend the council meeting with the devil pillar families' heads. You also have an inter-maou peerage mock-war today. You have re-scheduled it three times already, anymore and it wouldn't be fitting of your stature, not to mention that serafall-sama insists all the time of this being a 'who loves their sister most' match and spams all our official channels for said match. Need I remind you that?'

The death glare from grayfia quickly led him to shake his head. Grayfia, apparently pleased, left him to his work. Sirzechs picked up the intercom and spoke,

'hey serafall, it looks like a powerful intruder has snuck inside kuoh, other factions are already scrambling to get there. Please take a look'

'Kuoh?! So-tan goes to school there! , if they even touch a hair on my precious cute little sister's head, I'll flay them alive! I'll chop of their nuts and then I'll…'

Sirzechs tuned out her rant until she agreed to look at the situation. He, however, noticed once again how much serafall loved her sister.

'hmm, I haven't checked on rias in a long time ( read: 23 minutes), guess I'll surprise her!'. The Lucifer stood up again and proceeded to exit his office.

his plans were crushed when he saw Grayfia standing at the door ,unmoving.

'SIRZECHS-SAMA!...'

'SORRRYYYYY GRAYFIA-CHANNNN ! I'LL BE A GOOD BOY AND FINISH MY WORK!... NO GRAYFIA! NOT THE CHEEKS AGAIN.., I AM SOOOWWWREE!'

**Back to the park**

Issei was moving towards his home while having light conversation with the entity in his head.

'so you mean to say that I also had a dragon named Ddraig in me and that you had to lock him in order to stay inside me?'

**'yeah, both of us, if active would kill you instantly. Besides I don't think Ddraig likes me for what I did in the great war.'**

'so anything new from the system?'

**'let me check..'**

'God?'

No response.

'mr. Creator of the universe! Don't tell me that you are napping!'

**'No you idiot! I am not napping! The influx of data from system is too much for me after my … readjustment. Looks like your inability to concentrate on studies rubbed off on me.'**

'hey!'

No response

'c'mon dude don't ignore …'

**'ISSEI! MOVE !'**

'what ? Why?'

**'JUST FUCKING MOVE AWAY RIGHT NOW!'**

And so issei followed his command. Turns out, God pretty much saved his life because the place he was standing on two seconds ago …. Was a smoldering crater.

And out of the smoke..

Stepped out the most beautiful woman issei ever had the miracle of meeting. She had a nice height of 6'2". She had wavy blond hair that fell on her shoulders which complimented her sparkling blue eyes. She was dressed in WHITE garments of the old times.

Suddenly issei mind began running towards the perverted implications of that white dress and some water sprayed at the right places….. When suddenly he experienced a major headache.

**'dude! That my freaking daughter you are perving on about. Stop that this instant!'**

'oops! Sorry man I would try to….'

**'ISSEI!'**

'GEEZ... Ok man… just stop the headache.' And so the God relented.

The man beside blond lady, who issei didn't notice at first for obvious reasons couldn't take being ignored anymore and finally spoke up.

'you. Wretched human, are hereby ordered to relinquish control of our father by the divine authority of the seraphs. COMPLY, and your sins will be forgotten… no matter how lecherous and how many they are.'

'SHE KNOWS',**'SHE KNOWS'** thought the two beings simultaneously… which was weird considering That they both heard each other.

_'we must switch that off.'_ Thought issei.

**'I agree'** Replied God.

Now, as fate (system) would dictate, the angels weren't able to take God away so easily after all. Why you ask? Simple story

Another crater. Another explosion. Outstepped the dealer of extermination. All hail!...master of recreation…. Azazel!

/**system: REMARK:** " **please picture an imaginary audience giving an imaginary applause for theatrical purposes**."/

'hey Gabriel! You are looking extremely ravishing today. but I have a few things to discuss with this man…..IN PRIVATE'. At this, Uriel whined about being ignored by everyone and spoke up.

'Like i would let you take him, azazel!'

Issei could only watch as the two drastically overpowered beings got ready for combat. He contemplated his options for survival.

'**hey issei ! look who decided to join the party'**

Issei looked back and saw a girl almost his age in with her hair done in twin pony tails. She was wearing an extremely cute magical girl outfit. And she skipped instead of walking?! How cute is that!

However, her image shattered when he noticed the expression on her face. That look could kill a basilisk, and that's saying something. She spoke,

'You! How dare you threaten So-tan by infiltrating Kuoh!? And you azazel, what the fuck are you doing here!?"

Before azazel could explain his passion for the research of sacred gears and especially, container-type sacred gears, serafall's eyes fell on Gabriel, her archrival in beauty.

'And you Gabriel, this time you will accept my challenge for #1 supernatural beauty queen! Let's start now, first stage: strip tease!'

Gabriel looked extremely flustered now. Azazel hummed appreciatively for the incoming show. Issei's nose spewed blood with un-measurable intensity. A testament to his power as a godly pervert.

"**Issei ! I hope those are not for my daughter, or otherwise.."**

'Certainly not! This new women certainly has captured my whole attention. Look at those curves and those creamy thighs! Wooow! Oh look! She is starting to strip!'

' **yeah, you are right, wait! She is going for the panties first! That's not right!'**

'YES! That's incorrect! First to go is the bra, so the boobs capture the attention with their exquisite shape and jiggle, then it's the Panties for the final showdown that capture the hearts of men! This is incorrect! YOU CANNOT DO THIS!'

And so issei moved towards Serafall to correct her approach. However, Gabriel saw this and voiced her disapproval.

'Father! You cannot take part in this debauchery! You must come back with me to heaven!'

These words captured the attention of the present audience. Issei started sweating. On god's marvelous suggestion he decided to sneak off. Azazel and serafall, who, for the moment, stopped stripping turned towards Gabriel.

'FAAAATHERRRRR ?!' exclaimed serafall and Azazel.

'yes! He is alive and he is right there…. Where did he go?'

At that moment, all three of them looked around and couldn't find issei. God had had the system mask their divine signature so that they couldn't be found.

Issei, who has snucked inside one of the alleys with a sharp turn sighed in relief as he felt the OP beings not follow him anymore.

"**we dodged a bullet there, partner."**

"yeah, you are right. Especially, Azazel looked like he was dissecting me in his mind."

The perverted duo reached their home, where god set up an impenetrable oblivion ward so that the biblical factions couldn't track them down.

"big G, we can't run and hide forever, we need some additional backing so that if push comes to shove, we would end up safe and sound."

"**Astute observation partner, sadly not many beings exist which are both powerful and would help us outside the biblical factions. Maybe we could…."**

God stopped speaking as he gazed at who was standing on the doorstep to issei's house.

"hey, do you know this gothic Lolita, big G?"

No response

"Oh c'mon! this is getting old FAST!"

Inside issei's head, God shuddered.

'**Of all the people, it had to be …. Her. How troublesome.'**

/**system: REMARK: " status report: universe:N1R(21)TO. A certain pineapple-haired boy sneezed"**/

**The end, for now**

**Author's note:-**

Yeah I know it has only been minutes since I published the last chapter. I had this one in the reserve for a quite a while. The forthcoming chapters would take time, I promise no regular updates. But there will be updates.

R&R plz.


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